I don’t know about you, but sometimes my day is full of hella awkward moments. At the time it is happening is feels so strange. I get all giggly and girly when I face those situations. Most of the time I don’t know how to react. Let me give you an example.

First off, I need to give you a little background. Right now, I am working a turkey plant. I know, that sounds weird. A turkey plant? What the hell is that. Well hold your horses and I will tell you. Basically, they slaughter 20,000 turkeys a day and I have the glamorous job of netting them. No, I don’t chase them down and lasso them. My job isn’t nearly that interesting. What I do is put the fancy netting on the frozen turkeys you purchase at the grocery store for Thanksgiving. Aside from the bruises, blisters, and smelling like turkey fart, it’s not all that bad… Joke.

At this plant they ship in islanders to work. There is one who has taken a liking to me. I can understand why, I mean hairnets are so sexy. Who can resist an Aubree in hair net? This Samoan dude is named John. At the beginning of our “work relationship” he was my knight in shining armor. Shoving 20+ pound turkeys for 12 hours in one day can be exhausting. He was kind and helped me out. He made my one person job our two person job.

I’m not going to lie to you, I flirted with him. What can I say? It was the hairnet. I think I gave him the wrong idea because now he takes ever opportunity to stand by me and talk to me. The other day he gave me a sticker with something written in Samoan. Obviously I didn’t understand it. All the homies who could read it started to laugh and giggle. So, I joined in. I asked a few of them what it meant and I got varying responses. One lady told me it meant girlfriend. Ummm no thank you. Another said it meant I was hot. Which I am, but still. I took it off because it made me uncomfortable. I proceeded to ignore him the rest of the day. I made the huge mistake of giving him my Facebook information. Now he won’t stop messaging me. Lesson learned don’t flirt with poly boys. Although I should have learned my lesson from my mission… Lesuma, Nuku… Oh well. My life is awkward, and I have accepted that fact and I am ok with it.   

You want to read more stories of my life? Really, I haven’t bored you quite yet? He is one that happened a mere eight hours ago. I was sitting in my Business Law class next to my twin Aubrey. I opened my laptop to look something up. Aubrey asked me as question about something and what I heard was not what she asked. The struggle of being selectively def. What I heard was “Is your boyfriend working?” I broke up with my boyfriend a week ago and she knew that. I responded, “I don’t know, I dumped him a week ago.” She seemed so confused, so I tried to clarify the situation by repeatedly telling her that she knew I broke up with him. Looking more confused, she asked me if my Wi-Fi was working. Obviously, I miss heard her question. Like a lot. My professor said that he heard Wi-Fi as did a few of my classmates. Let’s just say the rest of that class I felt like an idiot. It’s fine. It’s a normal occurrence in my life. 

Thank you for reading my mindless rantings. I'm sure that there will be more stories to follow. I don't know how or when. but they will come. 

--Aubs